This is the season, with Thanksgiving and Christmas just around the corner, to reflect on people who have brought us comfort and joy during a time of need. When I hear those words, I think of the time when I was waiting for Maya to come home. As most of my readers know, we adopted Maya and it was a roller coaster of a process with so many ups and downs. I was fortunate to have many friends and family to help me through the tough times.
When I was waiting and feeling blue about the possibility that I might not have a child illuminating my life any time soon, it helped to dream and plan. I spent hours and hours planning her nursery. My friends were so patient with me. I'm sure it had to be tedious at times to listen to me go on and on about every little detail. But listen they did. And even more, they helped me with gifts of thought, time, and objects.
Maya's nursery was completed before she came home. I would spend hours and hours in there, dreaming of the day when she would be a physical party of our lives. When she could play and sleep in that room. Everything in the nursery was special for one reason or another.
Every time a friend or family member would give us a gift for the nursery, it was like a vote of confidence. They were telling me that they really believed she would be coming home to us. That one day, she would be there - in our home and in our hearts. My parents gave us the crib. My mom walked miles with me through baby stores and furniture stores, to find just the right crib. It sounds funny, but having a crib said to me that Maya would really be home soon - while she was still a baby. The crib is now converted to a headboard in our guest room and every time I see it, I remember the hours I spent shopping with my mom and the comfort and support that she gave me as we talked and searched for the perfect crib.
My friend Pat, gave me a hand-made quilt. She makes exquisite quilts and I treasure this one. The colors of the fabrics were so soft and cute! Because we knew we would be adopting a girl, she used the sweetest shades of pink and softest shades of purple. It's a beautiful and very special quilt, that warmed Maya and I on that very first morning she was home as we sat in the rocking chair and I gave her a bottle. Whenever I see or touch the softness of that quilt, I remember my good friend, and that first morning holding my baby girl.
My special niece, Lori, gave us an iHome clock radio. I had created iPod play lists of songs for Maya. I love music and wanted music to be a huge part of Maya's life. I spent hours on the train commuting to work, listening to lullabies, play songs, children's music, nursery rhymes. I chose special songs for the morning, when she would wake up - dreaming of the time when I would encourage my child to start the day happy and hopeful. Lullabies that would soothe her to sleep. I was thrilled to find a CD by Carnie Wilson, that was perfect for our bedtime routine. To this day, Maya knows that when she hears Wonderful World (the last song in the playlist) that it's time to go to bed. The gift gave me a way to put beautiful, fun, wonderful music into the nursery and into my daughter's life!
Please take time this holiday season to think about the people and things that have brought you comfort and joy. Think about the special moments in your life and who shared them with you. Appreciate the ones who have comforted you when you've been worried or sad. And "pay it forward" - think about who you can help, comfort and bring joy to for this holiday season and beyond.
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